When my daughters were just starting public school (almost 17 years ago now), I was more-than-adequately concerned about who their teachers would be. Translation: I was a bit wacko about it. I would spend time talking with other parents, trying to contact potential teachers, emailing the principal, and (as a last resort) praying. I was pretty sure that if they wound up in the “wrong” class with the “wrong” teacher at Geneva School, this leap of faith in the public schools would come back to bite us and they would be scarred for life.
Interesting, as hard as I worked at trying to arrange the perfect situation for the girls, I can only think of maybe two situations where my efforts mattered at all. Basically, what would be, would be. Even more interesting, each year and each teacher, each class of little hoodlums ended up being a fantastic fit. Some more than others, yes, but the “right” situation presented itself to us year after year. This should have taught me to butt out.
Sadly I did not learn my lesson. Still wacko 17 years later, I find myself most days trying to manipulate the situations in which my people (including my husband, left out of the previous pithy example) will be found. Like Frankie Heck of my fave “The Middle,” I am prone to arranging play dates for adults; looking at others’ Facebook pages for hints of things they may not tell me; “gently” reminding people of opportunities they should take; and getting other folks involved in my efforts to intervene. As the only extrovert in a family of introverts, I simply cannot leave these people to their own devices… right?
Uhhh. Hang on there, Crazy Girl.
We’ve been studying 1 Corinthians at Grace Church, and it’s so much more interesting than I even knew. Chapter 7 begins like this: “Only let each person lead the life that the Lord has assigned to him, and to which God has called him.”
It goes on… “Each one should remain in the condition in which he was called.”
And in case, like me, you didn’t get it the first time (or over 17+ years), “So brothers, in whatever condition each was called, there let him remain with God.”
Without going into too much detail, the point is that WITH GOD is the key. If we are safe in Christ, our circumstances are given by Him and are ripe for contentment because of His presence. I think it’s easier for me to be content with my own circumstances than with my girls’ or Kevin’s. Because of love, I want the best for them and have dreams of how that will look. What is missing in my heart so often is an acknowledgement of the truth that their Father has perfect plans for them, plans that may look different from theirs, certainly different from mine on their behalf. Chapter 7 goes on to talk about the benefits of singleness, as an example. My heart needs to rejoice in whatever life the Lord assigns to my people, and to rest in His choice for them.
This quote from Charles Spurgeon has caught my attention a few times recently. “Remember this: Had any other condition been better for you than the one in which you are, divine love would have put you there.” Profound and simple, the truth of this statement solves every Helicopter Mom moment for me.